IM BAAAAACCCKKKK

Hey all,

Let me first state how long its been since Iv even looked at this blog. For almost a year I felt compelled that ana was not for me. However after 15 pounds gained BACK and feeling completely out of tune with my self control, I dont know anything or anyone else to turn to EXCEPT ana. I do know that while I was here previously my life seemed to be in so much more order. Id rather continue this and get back on track for summer and for my life as a whole. soooooo......


Here are the golden rules:
Initially cut down to 600 from 1200 (women) - 900 from 1500 (men) calories.
Exercise 6 times per week for 1 hours a day. Do three weight sessions and three cardio sessions. No gym involved if you don't have the access.
Don't eat carbs after 4pm, never eat carbs within 2 hours of exercise or within 1 hour of exercise.
Drink 4-5 litres of water per day. You can have a green tea at the end of the day.
Limit your fruit in take to 2 pieces per day.
Never eat dinner after 6pm.
Adopt of low GI eating plan this is sustainable for life!
Make low fat dairy choices

Follow this menu plan as a suggestion:
Breakfast 7am - 1 cup hot water w lemon
20 minutes later have a bowel of oats w water (no honey) OR
fruit salad w low GI soy yogurt
Snack 10am - pear or apple (both low GI)
Lunch 12.30pm - muligrain sandwich w 50g tuna & salad (no butter)
Snack 3pm - low GI yogurt OR skim berry smoothie (no honey or banana) plenty of ice, 1/2 cup skim milk & 1/4 cup yogurt
Dinner 5.30pm - 120g grilled lean meat/fish/prawns/tofu patties (not fried) w spinach salad & mixed vegies (no whites, carbs) OR 3 egg white/soy omlette with ham, cheese and tomato
Snack - 1 scoop of low cal low fat ice cream (if hungry)

Exercise is must be intense. Refer to www.bodybuilding.com for your weights routine. Never do weights two consecutive days have a cardio day in between.

Cardio needs to include running, go hard up stair wells and cycling. If you have access to a gym include boxing and spin classes as well. You get the most benefits from exercise when your body is totally fatigued and this is when you see changes.

Hope this works for you all, I will be intensely changin the game up with this one : ) wish me luck and I missed all of my lovely followers

eh

So im not going to post what Iv decided to do about my positive pregnancy test. I DID, however, go to the doctors, and it was confirmed that Im about 8 weeks or so along. But due to the nature of this blog and not being able to please everyones opinions behind birth, abortion, adoption, etc, i figured id rather not have anyone judge me and just continue with what Im going to do. blah! Thanks for the commentary on previous posts! It means alot that I have followers who actually read my blog. Anyways Ill be back shortly with more updates,
xo
-B

fuck my life

dear bloggers,

my life sucks, fuck my life, my shitty life is gay....i really dont know many other ways to say it. I just found out the most devastating news of my life today. i peed on a stupid stick today and the faintest of two pink lines showed up. im so mad. how could this happen?? i barely eat, i do more drugs, and smoke more tobacco than anyone i know. how could this happen if we used a condom every single time, not even once did we slip up!!! OMG.....im sick to my stomach. i refuse to gain weight back, i cant do this. my world is falling apart. im failing out of ALL of my classes right now. im fucked. my world is being turned upside down and i feel like im sitting on the outside watching in. I dont know what to do, or what can possibly be done to fix this. urrrgghhhhh, this sucks.

what would you guys do?

guess whose back?

Dear bloggers,


yes, i know it has been forever since Iv posted on here. Not to to worry though, Iv lost about 35 pounds since my last entry and I couldnt be more ecstatic about it. I picked up a few newer worst habits then simply just cutting out food. I feel almost addicted to appetite suppressants as bad as weight loss supplements and the occassional line of cocaine. But Im falling more and more in love with my body everyday. More people notice my weight loss finally, and i feel like Im getting the attention I deserve. I just bought a new size medium swimsuit from wet seal which I love! its the kind where the sides are cut out, meaning i have to do like a billion crunches a day so that my fat doesnt hang over the sides...anyways im back to gain more insight on how all of my bloggers are doing and I want to lose another 45 pounds. Im at 140 now, but its so much better than the whomping 190 I was at a few months back. yay me, and yay us! I know ana loves me now...stay strong everyone : )


-B

suggestions anyone?

ok so heres my first issue. I cant eat when I wake up, all the way until like 9pm. Thats just the time I get hungry. I decided to eat when im hungry but FUCKKKK i dont wanna eat after 8pm but this would mean id never ever eat (who says this is a bad thing right?) hehe. unfortuanately I know i need to bring my metabolism to something so that i can continue to get the fucking fat off me. ugh im just super frustrated and for some odd reason...

unmotivated? like wth I know I shouldnt put a piece of chocolate in my mouth. the damn vending machines play mind games with me everytime i walk into or out of my building. I wish i could just kick the cravings all together, or find alternative routes out of the building that didnt take me to some outlandishly far place. ugh!

Im off to the gym right now. but seriously i need help, because i never know what the right thing to eat is or if i should even bother eating at all because obviously im not hungry. but i know its bad to eat at night. ughh. help? id greatly appreciate NICE comments. loves

xoxo

Fresh for spring

Hey everyone! Sorry I havent posted on here in a while, super busy with finals week and getting fired was really stressful, blehhhh. ill use that as my excuse for gaining 4 pounds. But I am back on track and in the right direction. I hit the gym today for 2 hours and have only had a smoothie today (which was bad enough, about 300 cals) but its already late, gotta head to a student panel and tour of the campus that im helping out with. Then by that time it will be time to head to the library for some quality study time. I have 2 days to get this english paper finished.

Anyways back to my dieting. I decided o allow myself up to 700 cals a day (i hardly ever eat this much anyways, unless im trying to) just so that I can work with figuring out the best ways to boost my metabolism for the next 20 pounds. I have until april 15th to be 20 pounds lighter. Spring break is this friday so I know this will be the hardest time to stay focused. (mother always force feeds me at herhouse) one of the pleasures of dormlife is that my roommate cant sit around and force me to eat. lovely! My mom sent me a care package for finals week and when i opened it all this candy and junk fell out all over the place. and i mean JUNK! candies, cookies, chips, cocoas, cup o noodles, you name it and some fat fucker found a way to fit it into these poor care packages that they send to nearly every freshman on campus! what the hell!?! give me money to get my nails done and relieve stress or something. haha im thankful, but i wasz pretty bummed that the only consumable thing was a few packs of tea, and even those were questionable brands. Anyways im still in gym clothes and this post is turning into something way longer than i had expected. Hope all you ladies are enjoying the weather starting to look better. springs right around the corner! lets think think bikinis!!!


xoxo

-B

.daylights saving time =)

So saturdays are my cheat days. not super cheat but over the past 24 hours I think Iv consumed small amounts of some of my favorite foods. (not going into any more detail, just know that 7-11 is the devil) I just got back from hangin out with a friend and decided to post at literally 4 in the morning. daylights saving time is a killer. I really wasnt in the mood for working out today either. I got to the gym and completely said forget it. it was really wierd. usually i look forward to workouts but for some reason mixed with my cheat day and the terrible week i had. i just wasnt up to it. hmmmm so tomorrow i have this family dinner thing so no more than 600 cals and it will be my only meal....most likely. than goin out with jaz to the club tomorrow. Im super excited and cant wait to go out. Alen looked at me today and said that he could super tell i was losing weight. He asked what i was doing and i just said i picked up a few more gym hours. I swear he knows about all of my food issues but refuses to accept the fct that they really DO EXIST. its just one of those things we dont talk about i guess. But feeling really tired so im off.. nighty ladies

stay strong =)

-B